How to address the envelopes, with 17 written-out examples; when to mail the save the dates and the invitations; what goes in the suite and what stays out; and the 35 questions couples ask most about RSVPs, plus-ones, children, size, paper, postage and printing at home. Customs vary by family, faith and region, so take these as the common practice, not rules.
Make the cards in the free wedding invitation maker: 75 designs, each a matching invitation, save the date, RSVP card and details card. For the words themselves, the wedding invitation wording guide has examples for every kind of host.
Write names in full, with no nicknames or initials, and spell out words like Street, Apartment and the state on formal invitations. Where a suite has an inner envelope, it carries only the names, less formally.
Wedding mail goes out in two waves: the save the date, which only asks guests to hold the day, and the invitation, which asks for a reply. The timing questions are mostly about giving guests enough notice to travel and giving yourselves enough time to count heads.
Six to eight months before the wedding is the common window. It gives guests time to request days off and watch for fares without arriving so early that the card gets lost on the refrigerator.
For a destination wedding, or one where most guests will fly, many couples send them eight to twelve months ahead so people can plan a trip around it.
Six to eight weeks before the wedding is the usual timing. That is close enough that guests know their plans, and far enough out that they can reply by your deadline without feeling rushed.
If the wedding falls on a holiday weekend, or many guests are traveling, the earlier end of the window (or a little before it) is kind. Guests who received a save the date already have the date, so the invitation can follow the normal schedule.
Three to four weeks before the wedding is typical. Work backward from the date your caterer and venue need a final count, then add a few days for the replies that arrive late.
In the maker the reply-by date prints on the RSVP card, in the same style as the rest of the suite: "The favour of a reply is requested by the fifteenth of May" on a formal design, or "Please reply by May 22" on a modern one.
Yes. A save the date is a promise that an invitation will follow, which is why many of the designs print "Formal invitation to follow" on the back. Only send save the dates to people you are sure you will invite, so finish the guest list first.
Addressing is where most questions come from. The short version: write names in full, spell out titles and street words on formal suites, and match the name to how each guest actually lives and wants to be addressed. The envelope examples further down show each case written out.
The outer envelope carries the full names, titles and mailing address: "Mr. and Mrs. David Alvarez" over the street, city and state. On a formal suite, words like Street, Avenue and the state name are often spelled out.
The inner envelope, if you use one, is less formal and names exactly who is invited: "Mr. and Mrs. Alvarez", or simply "David and Laura" for close family. It is also where children's names and "and Guest" usually appear. Inner envelopes are optional; many couples skip them and let the outer envelope do both jobs.
The traditional form is "Mr. and Mrs." followed by one spouse's full name: "Mr. and Mrs. David Alvarez". Many couples now prefer both first names, "Mr. David and Mrs. Laura Alvarez" or "Laura and David Alvarez", which is just as correct.
If one spouse kept their own surname, list both full names on one line joined by "and": "Ms. Rachel Kim and Mr. Thomas Reyes". There is no fixed rule about whose name goes first; alphabetical order or the person you know best are both common choices.
A married same-sex couple is addressed like any married couple: "Mr. Andrew Collins and Mr. James Collins", or "Ms. Leah Morgan and Ms. Priya Shah" if they have different surnames. Use the titles and surnames they use themselves.
An unmarried couple who live together get one invitation, with each name on its own line and no "and" between them. A couple who live apart can each receive an invitation, or the one you know best can receive it with the partner named on the inner envelope.
Professional titles go in front of the name: "Dr. Sarah Chen and Mr. Michael Chen". When both spouses are doctors, "The Doctors Patel" or "Drs. Anil and Meera Patel" both work. Military officers are often addressed with the rank written out in full, and many add the branch: "Lieutenant Colonel Dana Brooks, U.S. Air Force".
A widow is traditionally addressed with her late husband's name, "Mrs. Robert Hayes", but many widows prefer their own first name, "Mrs. Eleanor Hayes". If you don't know which she uses, ask a family member, or choose her own first name.
Ask. A quick text to the guest or a family member is better than guessing, and nobody minds being asked. You can also collect names and addresses with a simple form or message before the save the dates go out, which settles spellings at the same time.
If you can't ask, use the person's full name with no title, or "Ms." for a woman whose marital status you don't know, and "Mx." for a guest who uses it. A full name with no title is never wrong.
A suite is the invitation plus the cards that answer guests' practical questions. Each design in the maker comes with four matching pieces, and you fill in the couple's names, date, time, venue and city once for all of them.
The usual suite is the invitation itself, a reply card with its own stamped and addressed envelope (or a reply postcard), and a details card for everything that won't fit on the invitation. The save the date goes out months earlier, on its own.
In the maker the invitation and save the date are 5 x 7, the RSVP card is 3.5 x 5 and the details card is 4.25 x 5.5. Two Cultures & Faiths designs add a sponsors card.
Anything a guest needs to plan around the day: the ceremony and reception locations if they differ, hotel room blocks, travel or parking notes, and the dress code. The sample cards show the kind of thing: "A trolley runs from the chapel to Wren House at five", or "Black tie / Dancing until midnight".
Keeping these on a separate card leaves the invitation clean and formal, and it is the right place for your wedding website address.
Many couples keep the invitation itself to the who, when and where, and put the website on the details card and the save the date. When you add a website link in the maker, it prints as a QR code on the back of the save the date, so guests can scan it straight to your travel notes and online RSVP.
It is widely considered better to leave it off the invitation itself, so the invitation reads as an invitation and not a request. The common approach is to put registry links on your wedding website and point to the website from the details card, which is what the sample details cards do with "Registry and RSVP online".
Word of mouth through family and the wedding party covers the rest. Registry details on a shower invitation are a different matter and are generally fine.
Wording follows who is hosting and how formal the day will be. This section covers the conventions; see the wording guide for complete samples you can copy.
Whoever is hosting. Traditionally that meant the bride's parents ("Mr. and Mrs. Daniel Whitmore request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter"), but today the couple often host themselves, or both families do, as in "Together with their families".
The maker has a picker for this: together with their families, the couple hosting (formal or at a house of worship), the bride's parents, both sets of parents, in memory of a parent, with joyful hearts, please join us, casual, and adults only. See the wording guide for each one written out.
By long custom, "the honour of your presence" is used for a ceremony in a house of worship and "the pleasure of your company" for one held anywhere else. Many couples now use either wherever they marry; it is a matter of tone, not correctness.
On a formal invitation, yes: "Saturday, the twelfth of June, two thousand twenty-seven, at half past four o'clock". Modern and casual designs use numerals, such as "Saturday, March 13, 2027", and that is perfectly correct for them. The save the date and RSVP card can use numerals either way.
A common formal approach names the parent with "the late", as on the Flourish Script sample: "Mrs. Helen Moreau and the late Mr. Philippe Moreau". The in memory option in the wording picker sets this up. Some families prefer to honor the parent in the ceremony program instead; both are thoughtful.
The reply card is the piece that does the most work. A clear card and a sensible deadline save a round of phone calls later.
At minimum: a line for names, accepts or declines, and the reply-by date. Formal designs use the traditional "M ____ accepts with pleasure / declines with regret" form; modern ones use "Joyfully accepts / Regretfully declines" with a "Number attending" line.
The "M" on a formal card is the start of the guest's own title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., Mx.), which they finish in their own hand.
Only if the caterer needs entrées counted ahead of time. Several designs include meal lines like "Beef / Fish / Vegetarian" for exactly this. If guests will choose at the table or there is a buffet, leave them off and keep the card simple.
Both are common. A card with its own small envelope is the traditional choice and keeps the reply tucked inside an envelope. A postcard skips the extra envelope and usually costs less to mail. On most designs in the maker the back of the RSVP card carries the couple's return address, so it works as a postcard as is.
Either way, put a stamp on it. Asking guests to pay for their own reply is one of the few things nearly everyone agrees is a misstep.
A few days after the deadline, a short, friendly call or text is normal and expected: you need a count for the caterer, and most late replies are simply forgotten cards. Sharing the follow-up list with parents or a member of the wedding party makes it faster.
Size and weight decide both how the suite feels in the hand and what it costs to mail. The standard sizes keep things simple.
5 x 7 inches is the standard, and it mails in an A7 envelope (5.25 x 7.25). The RSVP card is usually 3.5 x 5, and a details card often sits between the two at 4.25 x 5.5. Those are the sizes the maker uses.
Card stock in the range of 80 to 110 lb cover is typical. 80 lb feels like a sturdy postcard and runs through most home printers; 100 to 110 lb feels substantial but may need the printer's manual or rear feed. Check your printer's maximum paper weight before buying a big pack.
A smooth matte or lightly textured stock in white, ivory or cream suits every design, since the designs are drawn on light paper.
A 3.5 x 5 card is within the size range the Postal Service accepts at the postcard rate, so a reply postcard is usually the cheapest piece in the suite to mail. Very thick or oddly shaped cards can fall outside it, so confirm at the post office when you buy stamps.
It depends on the weight and shape of the assembled suite, so the reliable answer is to take one fully assembled invitation, with every card, envelope and the reply envelope inside, to the post office and have it weighed before you buy stamps.
Square envelopes, very heavy suites, wax seals, ribbons and anything that makes the envelope rigid or lumpy can cost more to mail, because they may need hand processing. Guests abroad need international postage.
Many couples ask for hand canceling, which keeps the envelopes out of the sorting machines and protects the corners and any embellishments. Ask at the counter; availability varies.
Every design is drawn on light paper with the color in the linework and type, so a full stack prints at home without draining the cartridge. A few settings make the difference between crisp cards and slightly-off ones.
The sheet PDFs put two invitations, save the dates or details cards on each Letter or A4 sheet, and four RSVP cards per sheet, with crop marks at the corners. Cut along the marks with a paper trimmer for straight edges.
The print dialog is probably scaling the page. Choose 100% or "Actual size" rather than "Fit to page", or the cards will shrink slightly and the crop marks won't measure true. Print one sheet on plain paper and measure a card before you load the card stock.
Pick long edge or short edge in the maker to match your printer's two-sided setting; the back sheets are placed to line up with the fronts for that flip. If your printer can't print both sides, print the fronts, put the sheets back in the tray in the direction your printer's manual shows, and print the backs. Test on plain paper first.
Yes. Switch off the background color in the maker and only the linework and type print, so the card stock shows through. Choose a pale stock in the same family as your palette, such as cream under Ivory & Gold or a pale blue under Dusty Blue.
Gold and silver are printed as gold- or silver-toned ink, not foil. For foil or heavier stock than your printer can take, download the print-shop PNG, which includes bleed, and send it to a printer that offers it.
The invitation tells guests who is invited by how it is addressed. Being clear on the envelope is kinder than explaining later.
Add "and Guest" after their name on the inner envelope, or on the outer envelope if there is no inner one: "Mr. Jonathan Price and Guest". If you know the partner's name, use it instead; it is warmer and makes the place card easier.
Many couples offer plus-ones to married, engaged and long-term partners, and to guests who won't know anyone else. Whatever your line is, apply it evenly.
Children who are invited are named, either on the inner envelope under their parents or on a second line of the outer envelope. "The Walsh Family" is read as everyone in the household. Anyone not named is not invited, which is the polite way to say it.
Children 18 and older living at home usually receive their own invitation.
Address the invitation to the adults only, and add a gentle line where guests will see it. Some RSVP cards in the maker include "Adults only, please", and one sample details card says "An adults-only celebration". The adults only wording in the picker sets the tone on the invitation itself.
A short note on your wedding website, and a personal word to close friends with young children, heads off most awkward replies.
Call them rather than replying by card. Explain kindly that the venue and the count are limited and that the invitation was for the names on the envelope. Writing "Number attending" on the RSVP card, and naming each guest clearly, makes this less likely in the first place.
